It was originally published on Fanfiction.net (aka where fanfiction goes to die).
E.L. James’ pen name was Snowqueens Icedragon because of course it was.
Snowqueens Icedragon does not use quotation marks.
She does, however, make up expressions like "my very small inner goddess sways in a gentle victorious samba" and “I can almost hear his sphinx-like smile through the phone.”
They spend more time filling out sex-related paperwork than they do actually having sex.
This is my reaction to all of the sex scenes:
Because the human body doesn’t work like that.
This is my reaction to everything else:
Because the english language doesn’t work like that.
The 50 Shades of Grey trailer just dropped, so here’s a link to the original Twilight fanfiction that the book is “based” off of, because if you’re gonna read the book before you see the movie you might as well read it in its original format.
Reblogging because the reaction gifs are spot on.
I couldn’t stand FSOG and couldn’t make it past the sporking of the second book - but if you’re interested in the “original” fanfiction, now you have it. And if you’re interested in some genius sporking of it:
For various reasons, Bass Coast Festival is banning feathered war bonnets, or anything resembling them, onsite. Our security team will be enforcing this policy.
We understand why people are attracted to war bonnets. They have a magnificent aesthetic. But their spiritual, cultural and aesthetic significance cannot be separated.
Bass Coast Festival takes place on indigenous land and we respect the dignity of aboriginal people. We have consulted with aboriginal people in British Columbia on this issue and we feel our policy aligns with their views and wishes regarding the subject. Their opinion is what matters to us.